Happy New Month!
What was your June like?
My month was hard, but it ended well.
It was hard because the situation—the one that’s got me on an emotional rollercoaster—continues to be a source of many tears. However, the final week of the month brought a valuable lesson.
You see, before June, I had said every prayer and confessed every sin I could think of. Yet not a thing changed. There was no materialisation of the word I received from God. (If you’re wondering what this “situation” is, check out a few of the previous posts)
So I came to the conclusion that there must be a mega sin in my life that I’m unaware of, and this sin is “blocking” my prayers, and keeping God from listening to me.
It was around this time that I distinctly heard the Lord say to me, “My ear is attentive to your cry.”
This word brought me comfort for a day or so, but when nothing changed (again!) I began to question why God would say He is listening, but still do nothing.
Then, through a friend, the Lord sent me this verse:
Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:4 NIV
And it was then that I understood I was in training. The delay wasn’t about a mega sin, but about God maturing my faith. Now, you’d think that understanding what was happening would settle the matter for me, but nah! I was soon back to tears.
But God, in His infinite goodness, has shown me that I am impatient. I do not want to persevere. I want to have Him give me instant relief . . . to resolve issues immediately.
Yet, just as physical growth takes time, spiritual growth doesn’t happen instantly either. It too, takes time. Plus, the only way to mature my faith is to patiently persevere through discomfort, because I have faith that God will end the discomfort. Then, when I face similar situations in the future, I can relax because I have experience in trusting God to bring me through the discomfort. The post Through, Not Around makes so much more sense for me now!
As I write this, the Lord has brought to mind a verse which presents me with a choice:
“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”
Romas 12:12 NIV
The choice? Keep crying and feeling abandoned. Or, stay hopeful—actively trusting—because I know God will bring this season to an end. And, I suppose the longer it takes me to make the right choice, the longer I remain in this “bootcamp.”
What is absolutely certain to me is that I cannot persevere, be joyful, or hopeful in my own strength. Even now as I write, I can feel impatience nudging me to ask for this to be over.
“Lord Jesus, set me free from impatience! Help me to persevere, to be joyful, and fully trust You.“
Do you need to say this prayer with me?